Monday, June 25, 2012


Summer is here, and with it comes the onslaught of off-season trash from the networks. Thankfully cable picks up the slack, and this year TNT brings us the continuing saga of the Ewings with DALLAS. It's back and (presumably) better than ever!

I wasn't fortunate enough to have grown up watching shows like Dallas or Dynasty - I was busy with the lighter fare of classic sitcoms - but they've always held my fascination. Now in 2012, we as a nation get to check back in on the Ewings: a clan blessed with the wealth of big oil, but cursed by a genetic predisposition to never stop scheming.

The first of ten episodes aired a few weeks ago now, so I realize I'm a little behind in tackling this amazing subject. Let's just say that it's Gossip Girl in the South, and the twist is that the adult characters are far more captivating than the younger generation. 

Oh, and Mary Alice from Desperate Housewives (played by Brenda Strong, here as Patrick "Bobby" Duffy's wife) LOVES guns. Seriously, she fucking loves them:

Linda Gray's "Sue Ellen" is back, and considering a run for governorship! Unfortunately, she looks like this now:

Somehow, possibly by divine intervention, I no longer hate Jesse Metcalfe! I have such a soft spot for Christopher, the hard-working adopted Ewing. I wonder what it is...

Speaking of Desperate Housewives, the random hot piece that played Edie's nephew (before bitch got slapped and fired) is now playing JR and Sue Ellen's son, John Ross. See what they did there? Now see what actor Josh Henderson is bringing to the table:

In case you thought that I was exaggerating in comparing Dallas to Gossip Girl, I'll just remind you that in the second episode ("Hedging Your Bets") the entire cast all comes together for a lavish event where alliances shift and drama flows like the Botox in Sue Ellen's forehead. On the Upper East Side this would perhaps be a fashion show or masquerade ball, but this being the great state of Texas...


So basically I'm obsessed with Dallas. I know, I never thought it would be a thing, either! These caps were from the first two episodes, "Changing of the Guard" and "Hedging Your Bets". Check back on Thursday for photocaps from the third and fourth episodes, "The Price You Pay" and "The Last Hurrah"!

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