The mid-season finale finds our cast of characters in deeper than ever, with Bridget losing control of her emotions and Siobhan losing control of her Bro Henchman. Agent Machado makes some headway thanks to an unlikely source, while Juliet will do almost anything to sleep with her teacher. And if you still care about Gemma, your burden may be lifted sooner than later.
Tonight's installment (the last until January) resolved some of the back burner mysteries, and finally brought Siobhan back to Manhattan. Charlie/John ("CJ") has gone full-tilt evil and wants to kill Guh-emma, despite Shiv's protestations. She meets Tyler for an unfriendly drink, where she tells him that Andrew gave her a black eye. In truth she's given it to herself with the doorknob of her medicine cabinet (!!!!), proving that it's become much harder to tell which twin is crazier.
Discovering that CJ is holding Guh-emma hostage, Bridget breaks down and agrees to pay the ransom...on the evening of "her" 6-year anniversary with Andrew, with whom she has sex with early on in the episode (it's candlelit and awkward). Doing what he does best, Henry manages to fuck up the exchange at Penn Station - CJ knows the cops are onto him and shoots Guh-emma in the trunk of his car.
Meanwhile, in Rock Springs - Agent Machado loses yet another informant...Amber Benson, playing a stripper! Bodaway got to her, but not before she revealed that the mole in his department goes by 'The Matador'. His partner Jimmy (who's hotter than any other guy on this show...handle this, CW) is of course the double agent, and lures him to some kind of poultry warehouse trap. But Machado's too smart for that, and the tricker becomes the trickee!
On an entirely different show altogether - Juliet finds a skirt that nicely compliments her vulva, and continues Operation Hot Teacher. Mr. C keeps declining her advances, until he finally has to give her a talking-to offscreen. Juliet later takes a page from the Naomi Clark playbook, and tearily confesses/lies to her new, walking stereotype BFF that he "forced himself" on her. I guess they used up their "Rape" allowance on 90210. Oh, Juliet. I love you, but no good can come of this.
So how does it all end? Despite being shot AT POINT BLANK RANGE, Guh-emma's alive and attacks CJ. Making some of the ugliest faces you've ever seen, she almost manages to escape...before CJ shoots her. Again. In the head. The next time I see this woman it better be as a ghost or in my nightmares. Hoping to stop all this violence with more violence, Siobhan makes a dramatic entrance and offs CJ. She calls Tyler and tells him she'll be staying in NYC for a while, saying the baby is his. Bridget has a 100% for-the-audience conversation with herself, vowing (again) to get to the bottom of things. And now, your supersized Fall finale photocap!
It's been a great first 10 episodes! There was so much happening in this one, and I think everyone got to appear (save for Alien Cher). The ending isn't a cliffhanger as much as it is a solid promise that things are going to be even more insane in 2012, with Bridget and Siobhan occupying the same city. For now we can only speculate what'll happen when the show returns - How long before Bridget actually does get pregnant? Is Mr. C really as good as he seems? What does Agent Machado wear when he's off-duty?
Ringer Recaps return all-new in January, but be on the lookout for some bonus photocaps of the first five episodes in the meantime. Until then, keep it classy and crazy...just like SMG would want!