Wednesday, September 14, 2011


Last night was the dawn of a (slightly) more mature era for The CW, with the premiere of Sarah Michelle Gellar's new series Ringer. Playing the roles of identical twin sisters can be tough on an actress - not to mention the audience. Welcome to your weekly guide to telling Bridget and Siobhan apart.

We made it through the pilot you guys! In the case of soap noir-pra Ringer, the first episode meant meeting our primary cast of characters (SMG, her menz, and her clown BFF) and getting the catalyst of the show (Poor, trashy Bridget assumes the life of her rich, classy twin sister Siobhan after her apparent suicide) out of the way. So let's break it down series premiere can only go more batshit insane from here!

You're definitely  Siobhan  if...
  • You wear enormous sunglasses to draw as much attention as possible to the fact that you don't want to engage anyone
  • Wearing your hair in a Upper East Side Power Bun© makes you feel like the sexy version of Lily Van der Woodsen (only frigid)
  • You "did your research" about 12 Step programs so as to better manipulate your recovering addict sister
  • You enjoy slowly stroking mirrors, walls and other smooth surfaces 

You're totally  Bridget  if...
  • Your life choices have led you to a corrupt, Native American-controlled town in WYOMING
  • You don't know how to lie properly to people, despite having previously been a junkie stripper
  • You're goddamn lucky enough to have Nestor Carbonell relentlessly pursuing you so he can pump you for information
  • You keep your AA meetings up to date on your identity theft scheme in extreme detail, all the while maintaining that you were sober 

Overall a solid first episode. I'm willing to forgive some awkwardness, seeing as how there's a lot of ground to cover. Now that the plot is established though, it's time to bring on the crazy!

Next Week on Ringer:
Hair extensions, fancy parties and an overflow of marital problems!
Let's do this!

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