Monday, May 9, 2011

SUCCESS FOR THE UES

With two series regulars not returning for season five, there's definitely an air of peace in the Upper East Side for longtime Gossip Girl fans. Say goodbye by celebrating the best...of the worst.

When Michael Ausiello over at TV Line broke the story tonight that Gossip Girl series regulars Jessica Szohr and Taylor Momsen - both mainstays of the show since its first season - would not be returning for the upcoming fifth season, it was more than just entertainment news. It was a dream come true.

It's hard to even describe the level of disdain I have for the characters of Jenny Humphrey and Vanessa Abrams. Is one worse than the other? Well, one started out cute...and progressively became the most heinous, defiant gutter monkey that The CW had ever seen (not counting whatever goes on over at America's Next Top Model). And the other has been unanimously reviled since her very first appearance early in season one, only getting cumulatively more awful as the years go by. It's a tough call.

She went from crawling in Dan's upper-story window to drugging Serena at a masked ball - and Vanessa has been a judgmental bitch about everything in between. Please enjoy some of V's Greatest Looks:







By the time she was teaming up with Vanessa earlier this season, Little Jenny Humphrey had gone from perky teen to raccoon-eyed drug mule. Although I am a little sad that J's character will never be redeemed (and de-uglified), that bitch Taylor Momsen has made it abundantly clear that she's way above learning lines for money.

I kind of hope that in real life, Leighton Meester is taking just as much pleasure in this news as Blair Waldorf would (and I am). The plot-wasting, misery-loving, blind fashionistas have been vanquished! Now Serena just needs to ruin her creepy, pig-faced cousin Charlie's life, and the show can have a victory lap with the real cast before ending next season. Deal?

xoxo
J

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