Saturday, December 6, 2008

THE POWER OF JOE COMPELS YOU!



What many people don't know about the building where I live is that there are a lot of old folks...or there were at some point. My apartment in particular became vacant (as many more have in recent months) due to the untimely passing of the previous tenants. At first it sounds creepy, yes. But as I was moving in over a year ago, I decided that it could be fun living with a ghost. Kinda like "Dennis" who lived with Cordelia for a couple seasons on Angel.


My pet ghost is an old woman, who apparently died in my bedroom. Incidentally, our sex lives were remarkably similar for a while. Anyhoo - every now and then a door will close seemingly on its own, but she's relatively well-behaved. She doesn't usually help me out with anything, but thankfully she's not making the walls bleed, either. I take that as a sign that she doesn't mind me and Rob living here. The only real issue has been my shower: I've had more problems with pipes, leaking, tiles - not outrageous, mind you - just more trouble than (in my opinion) one tenant should have to contend with over an extended period of time.


Well last night, I solved the mystery. When I moved in, there was a shower caddy hanging over my shower head. It was clear that it wasn't brand new, so I just assumed that it belonged to the previous tenant. Is it morbid that I kept using it? Possibly. I chalk it up to laziness more than anything. I mean, it was a working shower caddy, and I didn't really feel like going out and buying a new one. If it ain't broke, don't fix it - right?



But as I was getting ready to hit the town last night, I realized that this may be the key to all of my shower-related issues. My pet ghost old woman is clearly bothered by the fact that a lazy homosexual is using her shower caddy. So what's a non-violent, elderly poltergeist to do? Plumbing problems, of course. So last night, I ceremoniously removed the haunted shower caddy from my bathroom. I might bury it or something.



The end is where this story gets really good, though. This morning I was awoken by my landlord, so he could show a painter into my apartment. His only task while there? To re-caulk the shower in my bathroom. This wasn't something I requested, or even brought up to my landlord. The painter just left a few minutes ago, and everything looks pristine and amazing. The verdict? My shower exorcism was a success! I hope that my pet ghost old woman and the spirit of her shower caddy are finally at peace. This house is clean!

1 comment:

"Mary" Scooter Ruffins said...

HAHAHA " a lazy homosexual is using her shower caddy."